You know you’re allowed to say no—so why does it still feel so awful? When you’re used to managing everyone else’s feelings, setting the boundary is only half the battle. The real work is learning to tolerate what comes after.

Sometimes your mind hasn’t remembered the date yet. But your body seems to have gotten the memo. You wake up heavier than usual. Maybe you’re exhausted even though you slept. Your patience is thinner. Your chest feels tight. You’re restless, distracted, anxious, weepy, or just… off. Nothing is necessarily wrong. Nothing happened today. And still, something […]

You can be ready for the routine, grateful for the quiet, and still feel your heart ache when they walk away. Every year, sometime around August, I reach the point where I am ready. Ready for routine. Ready for predictable bedtimes. Ready for everyone to have somewhere to be that does not involve following me from […]

Everyone admires the strong one. The dependable friend. The calm parent. The coworker who somehow manages everything. The person everyone calls during a crisis because they always know what to do. From the outside, it looks like confidence. It looks like resilience. It looks like having it all together. But what most people don’t see is […]

If you’ve been curious about EMDR but keep wondering, “What if it’s weird?” or “What if I do it wrong?”—you’re not alone. One of the most common questions I hear is: “What does EMDR actually feel like?” And honestly? It’s a little different for everyone. But it’s almost never what people imagine before they start. […]

If you’ve ever thought, “I’ve tried everything, so why do I still feel this way?”—this is for you. Take a deep breath for a second. How many times have you heard advice like: Here’s the thing. None of those are bad suggestions. In fact, I recommend many of them to my own clients. But if […]

Spoiler alert: Guilt doesn’t always mean you’re doing something wrong. Have you ever finally worked up the courage to say no… …only to spend the next several hours wondering if you should apologize? Maybe you declined an invitation because you were exhausted. Maybe you didn’t answer a text immediately. Maybe you told someone you couldn’t […]

Sometimes it’s what didn’t happen. When most people hear the word trauma, they imagine something obvious. A car accident. Physical abuse. A natural disaster. One terrible moment that changed everything. Those experiences absolutely can be traumatic. But they’re not the only experiences that shape a nervous system. Sometimes trauma isn’t about what happened. Sometimes it’s about what never happened. […]

If you’ve never been to therapy before, it’s normal to feel nervous. And if you’ve been to therapy before, it’s normal to wonder whether this experience will feel any different. One of the things I often hear from new clients is: “I’ve been thinking about reaching out for a long time.” Usually what follows is […]

Have you ever finally gotten a moment to slow down only to find yourself feeling restless, guilty, anxious, or uncomfortable? Maybe you’ve finished your to-do list and immediately started looking for the next thing. Maybe you sit down to relax and suddenly remember seventeen things you should be doing. Maybe you take a day off […]